The Blessing of Friendship

4/29/2011

The Blessing of Friendship

“Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family.” Proverbs 18:24 The Message

I have been blessed to have some great friends in my life. People that you can count on and who are encouraging. Many of you reading this now are in that category. I think that having great friends is one of those things that makes life enjoyable. There’s nothing like celebrating an accomplishment or knowing that there is someone who you can talk to if things are not going so well for you. Friends are a blessing from God.
I was reading an old journal from about 2002 and I noticed that I wrote that I felt like God was trying to make me become friends with a certain person. I couldn’t really explain how I knew that, but it just seemed to fit where I was at the time. I seemed like this friendship was ordained by God. And this was not someone I would have ever thought I would choose to be in a close friendship with. I didn’t even think she liked me and I wasn’t sure I liked her enough to engage in a purposeful friendship. But I obeyed anyway. And strangely enough over time I began to see why God put us together. She was able to sharpen me in areas that I needed to be sharpened in order to continue to grow. And vice versa. I was able to help her grow in certain areas where she needed help and support. And over the years we have been able to help one another get through difficult and even uncomfortable times. Today she is my best friend. And I probably wouldn’t have ever thought that to be possible. But somehow, God did.
I think back over the years and remember how we would choose our friends in the past. Maybe we wanted to hang with the most popular kids, or we were athletes and hung out with other athletes. Or maybe a particular interest draws you together. I know that I have lost some opportunities to develop great friendships in the past for superficial reasons. Sometimes the sins of our youth reveal things that we need to correct as adults. Fortunately, God values friendship so much that he can orchestrate them. We just have to be willing to participate in those relationships that He seems to be building. They may not look like what you would seek in a friendship, but you never know why God is putting you together. God knows what the future holds for you and who you need in your circle to help you get through the good bad and indifferent times of your life. God will not leave you alone. He is with you, but He will also send people to be with you as well. Don’t be so spiritual that you forget to nurture your friendships. They are holy, too.
I know people who have become such loners that it is difficult for them to even know how to be in relationships. They are so used to being alone, that they just stay that way. But even for them, God has a friend. God is their friend, but he even told Adam that being alone wasn’t good for him, so he gave him a companion. That word doesn’t just apply to Adam, or men. It applies to us all. We need each other. But we also need to create authentic friendships. You need people who can call you on your stuff sometimes. We all have issues and we need to know that there are people who love us enough to tell us off on occasion. Tell us the truth. Sometimes, you don’t look good in that outfit and somebody should have told you. Sometimes you are being a jerk and you should know that. Sometimes you are about to make a mistake and somebody needs to tell you before you hurt yourself or somebody else. Sometimes you are beautiful or handsome and somebody needs to tell you that, too. Sometimes you have to take the advice of the people who know and love you and ignore the naysayers of the world. Sometimes you do need somebody to affirm your gifts, your call, your dreams or whatever. Sometimes you just need a friend.
I am fortunate enough to even have friends from high school that I’m still close to. We are a pretty motley crew, but friends none the less. Especially since I am the only AKA amongst a group of Deltas. (I forgive them daily lol). A lot of people wonder how it is possible to still even have friends for such a long time. It’s been 15 years since high school graduation and they still come to my mom’s house for Christmas Eve for the pollyanna we started doing in like 1995. There have been ups and downs, births, deaths, weddings, funerals, relocations, break ups, bar-b-ques, parties, career changes, degrees, graduations, and everything else in life you can think of. But their friendship is still a blessing. They are like family to me. Plus, its always good to keep people close to you who have the ability to black mail you in the future because they knew you way back when. (Joking)
But God is not just about preserving old friendships. My challenge to everyone today is to be aware of those people whom God may be drawing you to to start a new friendship. You may not know why, but He does. Trust Him, He has a plan. We may have the nasty habit of getting so comfortable in what we already have that we miss out on opportunities to expand our circles even more. And maybe your circle is not going to shrink, it will just grow. I’m not real good at this because I’m pretty comfortable with the friends I have. As you get older, I think it becomes a challenge to be open to new friendships. There may be someone who needs you just as much as you need them. Especially if you feel God pulling you in that direction. Chances are, they will not look like your other friends. So you have to be alert. Your first instinct may be to dismiss them. But you never know what God will do through them. You might just have another addition to your family.